Madam Zaritska Predicts My Pregnancy!!

I was looking in the mirror the other day and noticed a little "Buddah" growing where my six-pack used to be. Maybe now it looks more like a tall can or a 40 oz of Colt 45. Whatever.

Given my moodiness lately, the vomiting I experienced Sunday night, my lime green toenails, the way I cross my legs when I sit, that the baby virus is going around Grace right now, or whatever, I must be pregnant.

Here is what Madame Zaritska thinks of all this:

The day you deliver, outside will be hazy. Your baby will arrive in the early morning. After a labor lasting approximately 17 hours, your child, a boy, will be born. Your baby will weigh about 15 pounds, 15 ounces, and will be 17 inches long. This child will have medium hazel eyes and a lot of red hair.

Basically, after 17 hours I get to birth a male red bowling ball

Sweet.